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Dec 3 2014

I Never Got My Baby #5, But I Did Get This

By at 1:56 pm

Remembering My Lost Twins, Even After the New Ones Are Born

I miscarried my first pregnancy.

In those days, the 1970s, nobody talked about miscarriage, so I grieved in silence. Only my husband and my mother knew.

In those days, doctors told you to wait a few months after a miscarriage before trying to get pregnant again. During those months, I found a lump in my breast.

In those days, the doctors recommended waiting a few months to see if the lump would go away by itself–maybe it was an enlarged milk duct from the pregnancy, they suggested.

It wasn’t. It was a tumor. Read more →



Note: The opinions expressed here are the personal views of the author. All comments on Kveller are moderated. Any comment that is offensive or inappropriate will be removed. Privacy Policy

Dec 3 2014

I Missed a Major Career Milestone, But At Least I Was With My Kids

By at 11:22 am

My Kids' Happiness Matters More Than My Success

Recently I was nominated for the state association’s School Psychologist of the Year award. When the awards’ committee chairperson encouraged the nominees to bring their family to the ceremony, I casually broached the topic at dinner.

My 13-year-old first said, “Nah, I’m good,” but after asking a couple of questions about the award, he said, “Yeah, I can make that happen.” My 16-year-old replied, “Meh. I want my me time.” He begrudgingly ended up changing his tune weeks later, claiming that he did want “to support” me (even if it was only after hearing that the rest of the family said “of course” they’d come).

It was a bit of a juggling act in finagling early pickups from school and getting out emails to the coach and teachers about missed practice and class assignments. It also was a challenge in ensuring their proper dress (“No, you cannot bring Doritos with you in the car just so your slacks can turn orange”). And, it wasn’t easy ignoring their incessant grumbles about having to endure a three-hour drive up to the hotel, in a packed car with all seven seats occupied; I made sure not to bring up the fact that there would be another three-hour drive back, late at night. Read more →



Note: The opinions expressed here are the personal views of the author. All comments on Kveller are moderated. Any comment that is offensive or inappropriate will be removed. Privacy Policy

Dec 3 2014

The Lesson of the ER & The Open Window

By at 9:49 am

open window

Our family recently lost a dear friend, and my husband and I have had to digest and process the immeasurable loss with our children. Soon after the death, my oldest daughter told me that she would never pray again. I asked her why. She said that she had prayed and prayed that our friend would heal, and God didn’t answer her. I hugged her. I tried to say the right things–that God always hears our prayers, even if God doesn’t respond the way we want; that perhaps our prayers did have some effect that we don’t understand; that there is always so much more to pray for, and we have to keep trying; that praying is good for us, it helps us feel that we are doing something, even if things turn out so differently from what we hope.

Not long after, I found myself spending the entire day in the emergency room, with severe abdominal pain. Apparently, these things happen, especially on days when one’s babysitter texts at 6 a.m. that she’s home sick with strep (which she caught from your kid). While the doctors were puzzling over my cecum, I was left lying supine, unable to see beyond the privacy curtain. Those curtains are not soundproof, though, and it’s hard not to hear the pressing experiences of the other stricken human beings in the room. I was left with no choice but to eavesdrop. Read more →



Note: The opinions expressed here are the personal views of the author. All comments on Kveller are moderated. Any comment that is offensive or inappropriate will be removed. Privacy Policy

Dec 2 2014

Sponsored: Win “I Know an Old Lady Who Swallowed a Dreidel”

By at 4:09 pm

I know an old lady who swallowed a dreidel giveaway

The countdown to Hanukkah continues, and we’re very excited to give away three copies of the hilarious children’s book, “I Know an Old Lady Who Swallowed a Dreidel” from Scholastic Books.

Perfect for the whole family, you’ve never seen Hanukkah or the “I Know an Old Lady” story like this before. Beyond the joy of a Jewish take on this most American of folk songs, the illustrations offer hilarious parodies of great works of art.

To enter, fill out the form below, and we’ll choose three random winners next Tuesday, December 9th. Good luck, and happy Hanukkah!

a Rafflecopter giveaway

As a non-profit, we operate on a shoestring budget. Paid advertisements and sponsored giveaways like this help us pay the bills. 



Note: The opinions expressed here are the personal views of the author. All comments on Kveller are moderated. Any comment that is offensive or inappropriate will be removed. Privacy Policy

Dec 2 2014

Does Picture Day Have to Be This Stressful?

By at 1:15 pm

school picture day is the worst

A couple weeks ago my kids had picture day at their school. We prepared well, I think. One kid got a haircut, both kids had showers the night before, and my husband was successful in scrubbing the week-old tattoo off my 5-year-old’s arm so it didn’t spend eternity front and center in her class picture. Instructions were given (eat breakfast and brush your teeth before getting dressed) and clothes were laid out. My daughter even willingly put on the dress she had picked out without flaking on me and changing her mind at the last minute.

And yet, all day long at work I fretted over how the pictures would turn out. Please, I thought to myself, somebody make sure there’s no dried-up snot or food crumbs stuck to their clothes or faces. Please, let them not smash their faces into anything, lest they have a busted lip in their school picture like my son did when he was 3. Let them show some semblance of happiness so that when they look back on their school pictures years from now, they (and their parents) are satisfied with what they see. Let the grossly insane amount of money we shell out for school pictures these days be worth it! Amen. Read more →



Note: The opinions expressed here are the personal views of the author. All comments on Kveller are moderated. Any comment that is offensive or inappropriate will be removed. Privacy Policy

Dec 2 2014

The 5 Types of People You’ll Meet When at the Grocery Store with Kids

By at 9:43 am

The 5 Types You’ll Meet at the Checkout While Your Kids Are Misbehaving

Grocery shopping with kids is always an adventure–sometimes amusing and other times downright traumatic, like the time I sat the children in front of a television in the food court, grabbed three slices of pizza, and returned to find my kids openmouthed and watching a man commit suicide in a Tarantino film. (Apparently someone had changed the channel despite store policy. We received balloons and free cookies that day which made everything better. Well, not really.)

As a divorced, working mom I simply do not have the freedom to shop alone. The task is daunting enough with the twins demanding everything in sight and the baby struggling to free himself from the shopping cart. However, the reception we get from fellow shoppers, compounded by physical challenges we face as a family in the store, makes the task even more unpleasant. Read more →



Note: The opinions expressed here are the personal views of the author. All comments on Kveller are moderated. Any comment that is offensive or inappropriate will be removed. Privacy Policy

Dec 1 2014

Sponsored: Win “The Mensch on a Bench” for Hanukkah

By at 3:33 pm

the mensch on a bench giveaway

The Hanukkah countdown has officially begun. There are just over two weeks before we dust off our menorahs and get this festival of lights underway (the first night, for those not keeping track, is Tuesday, December 16th).

If you’re looking to add one more tradition to your family’s Hanukkah celebration, “The Mensch on a Bench” may be just what you’re looking for. Featuring both a book and “mensch” doll, the set helps teach kids the story of Hanukkah and the importance of being a good person, or a mensch.

We’re giving away three “Mensches” to three lucky readers. To enter, fill out the form below, and we’ll choose a winner next Monday, December 8th. Good luck, and happy Hanukkah!

a Rafflecopter giveaway
As a non-profit, we operate on a shoestring budget. Paid advertisements and sponsored giveaways like this help us pay the bills. 



Note: The opinions expressed here are the personal views of the author. All comments on Kveller are moderated. Any comment that is offensive or inappropriate will be removed. Privacy Policy

Dec 1 2014

A Lifetime Spent Driving, But Where Am I Going?

By at 1:15 pm

Driving Time is My Happy Time

I spend a lot of time in the car, driving. In fact, the majority of today was spent driving, as I ran errands for my kids, for my husband, for my mother, for my uncle, and even for my dog. Someone always needs something which his or her daytime job or school doesn’t allow time for. And dogs can’t drive, so.

Mostly, I don’t mind. I’ve always enjoyed driving (if not running errands), and I rarely pass up the chance to hop in the car and run to the store. I admit to often heading to the grocery store in the next town just to make the drive last a little longer. I know where every 7-11 is. I know which gas stations are the cheapest. I know where the cops like to hide out on the beltway at 2 a.m. (And I am pretty good at avoiding them.) I don’t get a lot of alone time. Driving gives me the chance to just be in the moment for a little while. Read more →



Note: The opinions expressed here are the personal views of the author. All comments on Kveller are moderated. Any comment that is offensive or inappropriate will be removed. Privacy Policy

Dec 1 2014

The Top 7 Perks of Being Jewish in December

By at 11:23 am

Top 7 Perks of Being Jewish in December
Growing up, ours was the only house on the block with a menorah glowing in the window. This should have put me onto the fast track to Christmas envy, but it didn’t. I respected Christmas, but was never jealous of those who celebrated. In fact, watching my neighbors actually gave me a deeper appreciation for the simpler joys of Hanukkah. Here’s why:

1. Early-Bird Shopping. 

Celebrating Hanukkah means I usually have an earlier gift-buying deadline to meet than my counterparts. I have to get myself in gear way before Christmas shopping madness descends on the rest of the world. By Thanksgiving, I’m usually done. I spend most Black Fridays sipping spiced cider and recovering from a turkey-induced coma. Being Jewish means never having to freeze my tuchus off in a parking lot, waiting for a “Midnight Door Buster” sale.

2. Decorating Ease.  Read more →



Note: The opinions expressed here are the personal views of the author. All comments on Kveller are moderated. Any comment that is offensive or inappropriate will be removed. Privacy Policy

Dec 1 2014

I Have Three Healthy Kids–So Why Do I Still Cry When I See a Newborn?

By at 9:51 am

I Have Three Healthy Kids But I Still Cry When I See a Newborn

It has been over 10 years since my journey to motherhood began. I know I am lucky that my three perfect daughters are healthy, and I am living the life I always wanted.

So why do I still cry when I hear a friend is pregnant? Why do I still cry when I see a newborn in her mother’s arms? Why do I still feel jealousy when people complain about their accidental pregnancies that came unexpectedly and proceed uneventfully?

When my husband and I decided that we were ready for kids, it seemed that the path to becoming a mother would be an easy one. I was pregnant within months. We were elated. But elation was replaced by shock as I miscarried a month into the pregnancy. This was not supposed to happen! Read more →



Note: The opinions expressed here are the personal views of the author. All comments on Kveller are moderated. Any comment that is offensive or inappropriate will be removed. Privacy Policy

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