Apr 9 2013
By Jennifer Gilmore at 12:02 pm
Jennifer Gilmore’s new novel, The Mothers–about a couple’s journey through adoption–is out today! Check it out here.
The call from my sister came in the afternoon. I remember the day: bright robin’s egg blue, early spring.
“What’s wrong?” I said. She and I emailed and texted 30 times a day, but unannounced phone calls indicated alarm.
“I’m just going to tell you. I’m going to be as honest as possible. I’m pregnant,” she said. “It’s early, so I’m not telling anyone else.”
“You’re kidding!” I had been begging my sister to try to have a child–she was already 35–so that she and her husband would not go through any of the heartache my husband and I had endured in our six years of trying to have a baby. By then we were in the grueling and chaotic process of domestic adoption.
“No,” she said.
“Wow. That’s great news,” I said. “I’m glad you let me know.” I wanted to be thrilled for my sister, but instead I felt what was becoming a common emotion: that I had failed. Read the rest of this entry →
Jan 18 2013
By Cara Paiuk at 9:47 am
This past week I celebrated my third wedding anniversary. Since I was sick and confined to bed, I had time to think about these last few years, how I got to where I am today, and how unlikely a journey it has been…
Remember when you were little and you dreamed your life would be a fairy tale? I forgot about those dreams until a few years ago. It was Memorial Day weekend in 2009 and after a dry spell with dating, I was on a roll. Great date on Friday night! Great date on Saturday night! Little did I know that Sunday night would change my life forever. Read the rest of this entry →
May 25 2012
By Cara Paiuk at 11:29 am
Hasta la vista, Texas.
My husband asked me the other day if our lives would ever be sane. I reminded him of a promise I made when we married: marriage would never make our lives boring. What an understatement! Not all of our adventures have been fun, but you could never accuse our married life of being dull or uneventful.
We are about to embark on our fourth move in three years and our second across the country. Things in Texas never jelled. It never felt like home and our attempt to move closer to family ended horribly. So we circled our wagons and are heading back East. A wonderful house rental fell into our laps, and for the first time since we moved out of our parents’ houses we will have a backyard! Read the rest of this entry →
Apr 24 2012
By Cara Paiuk at 9:59 am
I think that we women support each other in so many ways by sharing our experiences, yet we have done a disservice by not talking honestly about fertility treatments.
I know that I’m not a worst-case scenario. I already have a child. The extent of my problem is that I’m over 40 and I don’t have a lot of time. My tubes are clear, my egg reserve looks good, I ovulate regularly, and my hormone levels are peachy. Plus, my husband’s sperm count is equivalent to 10 non-vegan men (my doctor described his semen as “dynamite”, leaving me to deal with my husband’s hugely inflated ego for days). And yet, we have been trying to get pregnant for almost a year and a half to no avail (five chemical pregnancies and one miscarriage). Read the rest of this entry →
