Jordana recently posted on Facebook about an article she’d seen on wsj.com. The title of the article, “Small Acts, Big Love,” pretty much sums it up.

Basically, a recent study shows that people who find small ways to show their partners that they care are happier in their marriages. Not surprisingly, when you’re compassionate, loving, just plain nice, you make your partner happier, and you feel happier, too. The research is focused on the small things–like warming up your husband’s side of the bed or peeling your wife’s orange or bringing home his favorite dessert. Apparently, the little things add up.

I read the article and it got me thinking about hot seat, a game my family would play on Friday nights growing up. Each week another family member was chosen to be in the “hot seat” and everyone at the table was required to say something nice about the person.  Read the rest of this entry →

• Posted in Parenting
• Tags: featured, friday night, husbands, Marriage

The new CEO of IBM, Virginia (Ginni) Rometty. Her husband is being lauded as a hero for being so supportive.

Today on Too Busy For Book Club (also known as 2Busy4BC when you’re too busy to write) we’re talking about this article.

Dearest Kvellerati,

Remember the old saying “behind every successful man is a woman.” Do you imagine it being said by some back-slappy asshole in condescending fashion? I do. But what about when the roles are reversed and the man is the one in the background?

IBM recently named Virginia (Ginni) Rometty as the first female CEO in the company’s 100-year history. The Times did a piece on her husband saying his career took a backseat to hers and lauding him for it.

A few things struck me about this article:

1)   There’s a double standard that when a man quits his job to stay home with the children, or puts his career on the back burner for his spouse, it must be because he couldn’t be very successful.

2)   Women do this all the time – quit their jobs, or slow their careers down for husbands, for children, to care for aging parents – and nobody throws them a parade or writes an article about their sacrifice.

3)   There’s a line where Ginni Rometty talks about how she wasn’t sure she should take a job because she didn’t feel ready. Her husband said “a man would never say that.” I love stories like that, that remind women not to apologize upfront, to just go in and take it. Hell yeah.

4)   The article talks about how most CEOs are married and many have spouses who have put their careers on the back burner. I’m wondering, in a relationship/family, can both people be hyper-ambitious in their careers at the same time, particularly if they are parents?

So, Kvellerites, I’d love to know what you think. Anything about this article chap your ass? Ring true? Irritate? Enlighten?

• Posted in Parenting
• Tags: 2Busy4BC, Dads, husbands, men, Too Busy for Book Club