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Apr 10 2013

How I Pretty Much Raised My Brother

By at 11:57 am

adina and brother alloparentingI had my oldest son a few months before I turned 30. Not young in the majority of the world. Not even particularly young in the United States. On the Upper West Side of New York, however, when I asked my doctor if, at 36, I was too old to think about having a third child, he told me, “Most of my patients your age are still thinking about thinking about having their first baby.”

The thing is, even though I gave birth to my first child in 1999, I’d already been raising one for about two decades prior to that. My brother. Read the rest of this entry →

Mar 28 2012

How I Learned to Clean

By at 10:23 am

Even now, I can't handle a messy room like this.

When I was growing up, any item of mine not put away in its place was, more likely than not, tossed out the window by my mother. At the time, my parents and I were living within an 18-square-meter room (“A very good size by USSR standards,” my father assures me. “Usually it was 4 meters per person.”) in a 1970s Soviet communal apartment (i.e. a single family dwelling crammed with as many people as the government felt like cramming there, with a shared bathroom and kitchen). There wasn’t exactly a lot of space for clutter.

As a result, this was how I learned to clean. Something not in its proper place? Out it goes.

My husband, on the other hand, likes his stuff. He likes his stuff a lot. His love for his stuff extends to a transitive love for all stuff, especially our kids’ stuff. Read the rest of this entry →

Mar 6 2012

An Immigrant Purim Spiel

By at 1:00 pm

R2D2 from Star WarsMy first Purim, I was 7 years old and newly arrived in the United States from the Soviet Union. I still barely spoke English, and was the only Russian-speaker in the  second grade of my San Francisco Jewish Day School. (There was one more boy who spoke Russian, but he was in the fourth grade and, well, way too cool to speak to me.)

Somehow, I managed to understand that costumes would be required. And somehow I had also convinced myself that the kind of homemade costume my mother wanted to send me in–the kind that she’d made back in Odessa: Little Red Riding Hood, the Snow Queen, Ethnic Ukrainian with a garland of flowers in my hair–simply would not do. Read the rest of this entry →

Jan 19 2012

Why I’m The Most Perfect Mom. Right? Right?

By at 2:18 pm
Ellis Island

I spent hours planning this educational field trip to Ellis Island for my kids...

We were sitting on the ferry as the sunset painted the New York skyline a rosy gold. It was an unseasonably warm January day, and I’d taken my boys and baby daughter with my husband to the museum at Ellis Island. Read the rest of this entry →


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