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Jul 15 2013

Causeless Hatred Can Only be Fought with Causeless Love

By at 2:27 pm

trayvon martin protestThe thing about “causeless hatred” is that it sounds like something that other people do.

Causeless hatred is something other people do–because it’s something that is obviously wrong. And we aren’t people who would do something obviously wrong. We’re thoughtful most of the time. We have people in our lives that we love. But causeless hatred–hating someone else for no reason? That’s something other people do, people who are bigots, idiots, war criminals, or terrorists.

This is a convenient emotional shorthand that we all adopt from time to time: we assume, in the big scheme of things, that we are the “good guys.” I’m sure most of us are “good guys.” And I’m equally sure that we are all guilty of instances of causeless hatred. Read the rest of this entry →

Jun 5 2013

Don’t We All Need Better Work-Life Balance, Regardless of Our Genitalia?

By at 2:40 pm

working dad coming home to daughterI recently read an article in Bloomberg BusinessWeek entitled, “Alpha Dads: Men Get Serious About Work-Life Balance.” Don’t be fooled, though–these are not dads who fight for work-life balance for all. Rather, they’re serious about work-life balance…for dads. Deloitte Dads, one such organization, is a group to help fathers with time management and family issues in the name of spending more time with their kids. Dads, they contend, are an unacknowledged victim of all the talk about mothers’ work-life balancing act.

“Men have to feel valued and wanted for the balance of their skills,” as Warren Farrell, author of The Myth of Male Power and Why Men Earn More: The Startling Truth Behind the Pay Gap–and What Women Can Do About It puts it. “People don’t invite the man who raised his children really well back to the 50th high school reunion to talk about it.” Read the rest of this entry →

Jun 4 2013

That Cheerios Commercial That Has Everyone Up in Arms, and What They’re Missing

By at 3:28 pm

alina adams responds to interracial cheerios commercialThis weekend, my email filled up with people sending me links of the interracial family Cheerios commercial, and articles about the controversy it triggered. I wonder why. (Full disclosure: I do not wonder why. Please see family photo on the right.)

The people who sent me the links wanted to know what I thought.

Here is what I thought:

I get it.

I totally get why a 30-second ad spot featuring a white mom, a black dad, and a biracial little girl would prove offensive to so many people. Read the rest of this entry →

Should a Mom Be Jailed for Her Own Stillbirth?

By at 9:44 am

woman in handcuffsAs I enter my final few weeks of pregnancy, I sometimes worry about ordering a cup of coffee. Too often, the barista responds, “Decaf?” or a stranger within earshot wonders aloud whether I’m “allowed” to drink that.

It’s not just coffee. When I was pregnant with my daughter, a waitress balked at my husband and my order of labneh, and a co-worker expressed shock that I was eating sushi (never mind that I’m vegetarian, and the sushi in question involved avocados and cucumbers). Read the rest of this entry →

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