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Jun 21 2013

Why You Should Definitely Follow Along As I Live-Tweet “Princesses: Long Island”

By at 3:07 pm
If you're not pregnant like me, I recommend washing the show down with a nice Long Island Iced Tea.

If you’re not pregnant like me, I recommend washing the show down with a nice Long Island Iced Tea.

Princesses: Long Island is a show that defies words. But fear not, Kveller readers–that will not stop me! I will be live-tweeting (as @Kveller) this car wreck of a “reality” show which implicitly defames Long Island, Jewish women, women in general, relationships, and basically all that is holy. My live-tweeting and the show will be on Bravo at 9 pm EST on (mark it on your calendars) Sunday night. And I CANNOT WAIT!!!!!

“Why on earth should I follow your live-tweets, Jordana, and about such an insane show?” you are thinking. “What’s in it for me?” I’ll lay it out for you below.

1. My credentials for both live-tweeting and reality TV are solid. 

I think of myself as a smart person, and yet in certain instances, I am drawn to reality TV the way some people can’t help but slow down when they see an accident being cleaned up on the Long Island Expressway. This has been true ever since I snuck out of work to watch Temptation Island back in 2000. There are certain shows that hit a nerve in me for their sheer idiocy. This show is one of those cultural moments.

I last live-tweeted for Kveller on Oscar night… and if you were there, you know what a hit that was. Admittedly, I was seriously inebriated at the time but JUST THINK HOW FUNNY I WILL BE ABLE TO BE SOBER!!! The mind reels. Read the rest of this entry →

Apr 23 2012

What Happened to the Jewish American Princess?

By at 10:26 am

Acrylic nails: one of the markers of the Jewish American Princess.

I was absolutely astounded the other day when my younger stepson, Eli, who is 11, was musing about his sister Penelope’s new-found princess obsession–it had to happen sometime–and he said, “You know what’s funny? There’s no Jewish princesses.”

Bless his heart! No Jewish princesses?

I had a vague sense of the existence of the JAP stereotype in high school. I remember my friend Fran speaking dismissively of both WASPs and JAPs and wondering why she hated bugs and Asians so much, but soon enough I saw Spaceballs and was able to recognize a type–not someone I came in contact with myself very often, but sure, I knew young women sorta like that.

Then I got to college. Barnard, specifically. Hoo boy. Read the rest of this entry →


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