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Jun 26 2013

Happy Birthday! (And Sorry About That Whole Second Child Thing)

By at 3:52 pm

carla naumburg and rosie third birthday Dear Rosie,

You are 3 years old today. You should know this because we’ve been talking about it for weeks and your older sister threw an unbelievable tantrum yesterday morning that was allegedly about socks, but we both know it’s about you getting birthday attention when she’s not. Also, your Bubbe and Zayde bought you a fancy cupcake with sprinkles for your birthday dinner last night.

Now, I know that when your sister turned 3, she got a big birthday party at the park with all of her friends and a lot of fancy cupcakes, and all you got was dinner with your parents and grandparents. Don’t worry. We’ll get to the party just as soon as I can find the save the date email that I cleverly sent out to our friends and then promptly lost. (Let’s be honest, you’re a second child. You don’t really have your own friends. Fortunately, you seem to like most of the younger siblings of your sister’s friends.)  Read the rest of this entry →

Nov 26 2012

How Can I Help My Daughter Cope With Our New Baby?

By at 12:52 pm

mika and romiDear Kveller Readers,

As many of you know, two weeks ago today I gave birth to a beautiful baby girl. She did us the favor of waiting out both Hurricane Sandy and the presidential election. And so far during her short life on the outside she has continued to exhibit considerate behavior—sleeping long stretches, eating well, and making adorable faces.

Now, her 3-year-old sister is a different story. Last night I had a dream that bandits had kidnapped my older child and I was forced to negotiate her release in a produce market in South America from a guy selling mangoes. Not the most subtle dream I’ve ever had. Yes, it does feel like somebody has taken my sweet child who used to make me smile and laugh and replaced her with a child I don’t know, one who reduces me to a pile of tears.

So, I’m turning to you dear readers and writers to offer some advice. How oh how do we get through these first weeks? How do I help my 3-year-old understand that just because we have another baby we don’t love her any less? How do we help her understand all those big emotions?

And with that, I turn it over to you. We’re devoting this week to life with two (or more) and how to cope. Looking forward to advice from all you wise women and men.

Debbie

Kveller Editor

Oct 3 2012

That Baby is Totally and Completely Screwed

By at 4:45 pm
Jordana Horn's fourth child

Jordana and Baby G.

I’m sitting in the kids’ service for Sukkot, my 38-week-pregnant body uncomfortably positioned on a folding chair. In front of me is my 14-month-old daughter, Baby G. She is sitting for the first time in a plastic toddler school chair, in a circle with other kids.

It’s clear that she is profoundly mesmerized by the proceedings. It is blowing her mind how the service leader knows her name, and how she is asked to clap at regular intervals. She keeps turning around to look at me with her huge, gap-toothed grin on her face, as though she’s saying, “Can you BELIEVE this?”

She is sweet, and innocent, and beautiful. I stare at the little Florence Henderson-esque blond curls on the back of her neck. In an act of tremendous restraint, I somehow refrain from leaning over, grabbing her and covering her with kisses. I love her. And I pity her.

This gorgeous baby, light of my life, is totally and completely screwed. Read the rest of this entry →

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