Oct 21 2014
My husband, Jeff, and I were three years into our marriage when we got the exciting news of a baby on the way. As an expectant Jewish mother, I knew that I would not have a baby shower due to tradition. But as an expectant Jewish mother excited to celebrate my pregnancy, I was inspired to take part in a different type of tradition–a gender reveal party.
I enjoy a bit of mystery, but Jeff’s not big on surprises. It worked out well in this case, because it made it easy to hatch a plan for the party. Jeff got the news from our doctor while I happily stayed in the dark, ready to share in the surprise along with our family and friends. Read the rest of this entry →
Oct 7 2014
As even Kveller has reported, actress Mila Kunis has given birth to her first child, a daughter. The dad is her former “That 70s Show” co-star, Ashton Kutcher.
On Friday, they revealed the baby’s name: Wyatt Isabelle.
And my first thought was: Mila’s parents will never be able to pronounce it. Read the rest of this entry →
Nov 4 2013
What’s the worst that could happen?
It’s my mother’s favorite hypothetical, though she means it literally. And while the answers remain unspoken, the preemptive nervous energy abounds.
I’d remained oblivious to her anxiety in my coddled childhood, and dodged it after college when I lived alone in midtown Manhattan, accepting drinks from strangers and letting potential serial killers escort me home. But as soon as I got married to a nice Jewish boy, priming my womb for babies, Mom began finding solutions to “the worst” before I even perceived a problem. Sketchy first apartment? Better move to a nicer block. Leftover Chinese food? Better not eat it. It’s a boy? Better hire a baby nurse to care for the circumcision wound. Can’t be too careful…it could get infected. Our family had moved within 10 minutes of my parents before my baby was 6 months old. With my mother’s vigilance and diligence, my own reflexive panic began to show.
So it was no surprise that I didn’t know how to deal with a standard carpool request: another work-at-home parent offered to alternate days at preschool pick-up. Everyone did it, I assured my mother. (All the cool parents did it–just like the cool kids in junior high smoked cigarettes at the Exxon station before the first bell.) Read the rest of this entry →
Oct 16 2013
Anyone who’s had a baby knows what “nesting” is. It’s the urge that kicks in shortly before the baby will be born–the one that inspires you to actually organize and prepare your home for the impending new arrival. Nesting evokes a doting mother bird, preparing the hunk of twigs and detritus that will become a cozy home for a family. It’s a lovely idea.
It becomes somewhat less poetic with the imminent arrival of your fifth child.
With the fifth kid, nesting now incorporates:
*Ample profanity: “Where the f*ck did we put that big Tupperware bin full of the newborn onesies?”
*Grunting: If you are not supposed to do any heavy lifting at the end of your pregnancy, how are you supposed to get the bassinet out of the basement while making sure the current baby doesn’t tumble down the stairs? Read the rest of this entry →
Jul 16 2013
My husband and I are pretty rational people. He’s a scientist, for Pete’s sake. But more and more often we find ourselves falling prey to superstitious behavior. We pu pu pu like it’s going out of style.
So, what do the bubbes mean when they “pu pu pu“? It’s short for “Bli ayin hara pu pu pu,” which essentially translates as: “There should be no evil eye spit spit spit.” Its Yiddish cousin is “keynahora.”
Basically, there’s a superstitious fear that by speaking about your fortune you’re actually attracting the attention of the evil eye, who will come down and spoil it all. God forbid. (Have I mentioned that my 2-year-old says God forbid?!) Read the rest of this entry →
Sep 13 2012
Over the past few weeks, Emily has been chronicling her journey about deciding to become a single mother by choice. Today she adds some superstitions into the equation.
I am Jewish, which, in my family, also means I am superstitious. Sadly, my maternal grandmother died before I was born, but she definitely left her mark. My mother is superstitious. She says, “puh, puh, puh” after any comment that may reflect happiness or good fortune because, God forbid, mentioning it might make it go away. So much for the laws of attraction! Read the rest of this entry →
Aug 2 2012
Lately, we’ve been talking a lot about nursery rooms. The ones we want, the ones we have, and the ones that are Jewish. But many Jewish parents often wait to decorate a baby’s nursery room until after they are born, on account of superstitions involving the ayin hara, or evil eye. One Kveller reader recently wrote to us about just this, and we thought we’d open up the floodgates to the rest of our readers to see what you guys think.
Judith from Miami writes: Read the rest of this entry →
Jul 26 2012
As my baby bump grows bigger and bigger, the reality of an actual baby is getting more and more intense. In preparation for our little girl, I knew I would need to make a room for her. Our little house is a three-bedroom: one for Paul and I, one for our 16-year-old son PJ, and the other was functioning as my home office/home for a LARGE open kennel for our 85 lb pit bull, Lucy. Not that I actually did a lot of work in the office, or even spent much time in there at all–in fact, it’s largely become Lucy’s room. But the process of drastically changing this room has been just that, a process!
The first step has been moving Lucy out of the room–because she used to be in the habit of chewing up various parts of our house when we would leave, so she would have to go into her kennel when we were gone. Since the school year’s ended, we’ve started leaving Lucy outside the kennel in our absence and she’s actually been a little angel. As she gets older, she’s much more calm and less destructive. Now she just sleeps on the couch until we get home and has given us confidence that we can finally get rid of her MASSIVE kennel. So, phase one has been sort of accomplished–yay! Read the rest of this entry →
Jun 18 2012
My red string bracelet is much more comforting than the one the hospital gave me.
I’m a fairly superstitious person. I don’t walk under ladders and I never put shoes on a table. During pregnancy, my husband and I don’t announce we’re expecting until after 12 weeks and we don’t tell ANYONE the names we’ve chosen for our children until they are born. One of my favorite memories of the birth of our son was after he was placed on my chest, amidst our incredible joy and tears; my husband said his name out loud for the very first time. It was magical.
After a difficult third trimester with my firstborn and a subsequent first trimester miscarriage, I went into this pregnancy with a lot of fear. I felt like the second trimester was my only safe place, the only time where I could breathe and hope. I needed to redirect my mind to the possibility that everything would be okay. I wanted to focus on bringing a new life into this world one day at a time and not wish the months away until 36 weeks when I am in the clear. I decided that for this pregnancy I would wear a red string as a symbol of protection. Read the rest of this entry →
Apr 9 2012
I'm feeling kicks, but it still doesn't feel real.
I was talking to a friend the other day when I felt a kick. Not like the “fluttery” sensations What to Expect had prepared me for at this stage–the ones I’ve been convincing myself I’ve been feeling over the past few weeks–but something much more substantial. Like a little foot pushing on the inside of my uterus kind of substantial. “AH!” I told her, “I think I just felt a serious kick!” She got excited and then exclaimed that I couldn’t go making her cry at work. Cry? I thought. That hadn’t even crossed my mind. Read the rest of this entry →