humor

These Moms Wrote Yelp Reviews of Their Babies–And You Can Too!

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Having your first child is a serious decision that requires a lot of planning and forethought. You read books, watch videos, talk to friends and family, consult with your doctor, and do basically everything you can to make sure you aren’t making a giant, 18 year long mistake. However, the parenting world has been lacking one very important, no, absolutely CRUCIAL tool to inform aspiring parents about what to expect when they’re expecting to expect.

Yelp reviews.

You check them before you go out to eat, try a new hair salon, or hire a cleaning service, so why not check Yelp reviews from parents who have had some time to really get to know their little bundle of questionable emotions? Thanks to the humor blog The Ugly Volvo, now you can.

One mom writes:

“Delivery: first off, gross. There’s a good reason the brochures don’t show you how the baby gets out of your body, because that whole part is disgusting.”

Another writes:

“My husband and I had heard good things and just recently got around to trying it–cannot recommend it highly enough!”

Of course, it’s all in good fun and not actually from regretful mothers, and we think it’s pretty damn funny. In fact, we want to see more. Submit your Yelp review of your baby in the comments below, and you might just see it on our website. 

The opinions expressed here are the personal views of the author. Comments are moderated, so use your inside voices, keep your hands to yourself, and no, we're not interested in herbal supplements.

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