Dads

How ‘Dad Guilt’ Is the Same and Different From Mom Guilt

happy family father and child on meadow with a kite in the summer on the nature

Everyone knows about “Mom Guilt.” It’s like your shadow–always there even when you don’t want it to be. But apparently, dads feel it too (Happy Father’s Day!).

According to an online survey of over 1,200 dads conducted by Fatherly and Today, dads feel bad when they work too much and miss that recital or performance, or spend too much time on their phones, or get frustrated by not having enough “me time.”

The survey shows that dads feel pressured to fulfill that traditional breadwinner role, with 1 in 4 dads feeling guilty for not providing enough money to take care of their families. About 19 percent feel guilty about not being present enough with their kids, while 17 percent feel like they work too much outside the home.

When it comes to childcare, it seems 50 percent of dads admit that their partner does more to take care of the kids. At least, the awareness is there, which means progressive change can actually happen. And on the other hand, 10 percent of dads admitted to not feeling guilty for not doing more housework.

I guess those dudes still think not doing dishes is OK. You know, someone else (aka mom) will do it.

But here’s the big difference. Unlike moms, who frequently feel judged by others, 56 percent of the dads reported not worrying what others think of their parenting style.

Well, isn’t that nice? Doyin Richards said it best in Today:

“I don’t care if you’re a mom or a dad, we’ve all done the ‘hide in the bathroom trick. Many parents try to act as if they’re above this sort of thing, but most of us aren’t (myself included). Just own it and understand that it’s part of parenting.”

The opinions expressed here are the personal views of the author. Comments are moderated, so use your inside voices, keep your hands to yourself, and no, we're not interested in herbal supplements.

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