It starts with a dorm room, a handful of Target bags and a lump in your throat. You hug your child goodbye on a leafy campus lawn, hoping they’re ready for what lies ahead. You’ve prepped them with laundry skills, Amazon Prime and a sturdy laptop. But in 2025, for many Jewish parents, there’s another question lingering: Have I prepared my child emotionally and spiritually for what it means to be Jewish on campus today?
Antisemitism on college campuses is no longer a rare or isolated occurrence. Jewish students across the country report feeling unsafe, silenced or forced to choose between their identity and belonging. Whether it’s a swastika on a bathroom wall or a classroom debate that veers into hostility, our children are entering environments where they may be challenged not only intellectually, but existentially.
So what can we, as parents, do? How can we give our children not just protection, but resilience; not just awareness, but a deep sense of self? Here’s how to start.
1. Help Them Build a Strong Jewish Identity
Jewish identity isn’t a vaccination; it’s a muscle. It grows stronger with use, with reflection and with connection. Before your child arrives on campus, take time to help them explore what their Jewishness means to them. Share family stories. Celebrate holidays with intention. Talk about history — not just the trauma, but the perseverance, joy and creativity woven into our people’s journey.
Young adults who feel grounded in their identity are better equipped to face challenges without losing their center. Encourage them to seek out Jewish spaces on campus — Hillel, Chabad, Jewish student unions or organizations that support connection to Israel across the spectrum of beliefs. Belonging to a supportive community can make all the difference.
2. Teach Emotional Regulation and Trauma Awareness
The trauma our children may experience isn’t always obvious. It can come in the form of social exclusion, coded language or the pressure to remain silent about their Jewishness. These experiences can trigger powerful emotional reactions. Understanding the body’s trauma responses — fight, flight, freeze and fawn — gives students the tools to notice what’s happening inside them. A student might lash out in anger (fight), shut down and isolate (freeze), try to “keep the peace” by staying silent (fawn) or disappear socially or academically (flight).
You can help by teaching grounding techniques: deep breathing, journaling, movement, prayer or even just calling home. Let your child know it’s okay to feel overwhelmed. What matters is what they do with those feelings.
3. Recognize When They May Need More Support
Sometimes resilience means knowing when to ask for help. If your child begins showing signs of distress — persistent anxiety, disconnection from friends, trouble sleeping or loss of interest in what they used to love — they may benefit from professional support.
Normalize therapy. Let them know that seeing a therapist is not a sign of weakness, but of wisdom. If possible, help them find a therapist who understands the unique dynamics of Jewish identity and campus life.
Organizations like Gesher Campus Care can assist in connecting students with culturally competent, trauma-informed therapists who understand what it means to navigate antisemitism, identity and mental health.
4. Talk About Post-Traumatic Growth
While trauma can leave scars, it can also create space for transformation. Research on Post-Traumatic Growth (PTG) shows that many people emerge from adversity with a deeper appreciation for life, stronger relationships, greater spiritual insight and a new sense of purpose.
Our job as parents is not just to protect our children from pain, but to help them find meaning in it. We can ask: “What did this experience teach you about yourself?” or “How did this change your perspective on community or values?”
It’s not about silver linings or toxic positivity — it’s about honoring pain while also holding space for resilience and wisdom.
5. Stay Connected, Stay Curious
College is a time of individuation, but your role is still critical. Create a relationship where your child feels safe to share their real experiences — even the messy ones. Ask open-ended questions like, “What’s been surprising about Jewish life on campus?” or “How are you feeling about your place in it?”
Be willing to listen more than you speak. And when you do speak, share your own stories of identity, resilience and growth. Let your child know that you, too, are still learning. If your child returns home with evolving views on their Jewish identity or connection to Israel, hold space for those shifts. Ask where their questions are coming from and what experiences shaped them. These conversations may be complex, but they’re opportunities for deep connection, learning and growth — for both of you.
We cannot walk these journeys for our children. But we can walk beside them, offering wisdom, empathy and a deep well of Jewish strength that stretches across generations.
