Loving My Pickle Man – Kveller
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Loving My Pickle Man

For the last few weeks my husband has been working hard on fine-tuning his pickle recipe. Finally, last week, he got it just right—not too salty, not too bland. A real half-sour. Now he’s working on replicating his success.

All of which is to say…I married the pickle man, just like I always knew I would.

When I was a kid my mother and I watched Crossing Delancey. In it, a beautiful 30-something Amy Irving stars as Izzy, a professional , independent New York woman chasing pretentious jerks who aren’t worth her time, resists and insults, then falls for, a nice, regular guy who sells pickles on the Lower East Side.

My mom was all about the poet—the charming cad that breaks her heart. Even after the poet had shown his true colors, my mom still insisted she would go for him every time.

For my part, I really didn’t get it. Was the woman in the movie (or my mom) crazy? Was she blind? Clearly it was the pickle man, all the way.

The pickle man was kind to everyone, and cared about the people in his community. He was smart, handsome, and a real family man. And he loved Izzy despite the fact that she was kind of a nut. In other words, my teenage dream.

I’ve always had a thing for the under-appreciated mensch. I once dumped a handsome poet for an awkward rabbinical student. I’m just funny like that.

When I first met my husband, I hardly noticed him. But when I finally did notice him, I picked up on his pickle-manliness before anything else.  He was kind, funny and preternaturally smart. He put the needs of others before his own. And in a flash of divine wisdom one Yom Haatzmaut I realized, “That man would make an amazing father.” From that moment it was just a matter of time.

Some women get turned on by wealth, others by a perfect face. For me…it’s all about a man’s pickle-potential.  Money gets spent, looks fade. But a real mensch never goes out of style.

My Husband’s Pickle Recipe

(adapted from Kosher by Design Kids in Kitchen by Susie Fishbein)

¾ cup white vinegar

¼ cup kosher salt

4 tsp minced garlic

2 sprigs fresh dill

2 tablespoons pickling spice

6 kirby cucumbers

Water (enough to cover the pickles)


Combine all ingredients in a medium-size jar. Place in refrigerator for 2-4 days. Enjoy!

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