I'm Not Trying to Lose a Pound or Two, No Matter What that Interview Said – Kveller
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I’m Not Trying to Lose a Pound or Two, No Matter What that Interview Said

Publicity is an important part of my job. That means I have a publicist (who is really cool and she’s from Houston and has tattoos and wears spiky heels and skinny jeans to the office and she’s really fun) and my publicist has me do interviews with magazines and websites and arranges photo shoots (like the one I did in Paris last week–whaaa!?).

My publicist is happy when “big” outlets want to interview me because that means visibility. It means the possibility for even bigger outlets to take notice of me. It also means that as I try to go for my second Emmy nomination, my name is “out there” in ways that actually do matter and help in the nomination/popularity contest that is my industry. 

Here’s my thing, though, people who interview me for sites and magazines and such: if you interview me and you record our interview, do not misquote me saying things you want me to say because it serves your publication. If you want to sell a product or a lifestyle, don’t make me the salesperson for it if I don’t want to be.

Case in point: I call myself the fattest woman in Hollywood and folks, I may very well be. I don’t diet, I don’t exercise any more than your average mama, and I eat foods that are fun and delicious. A recent interview I did quoted me suggesting what I do when I want to lose “a pound or two.”

First of all, don’t put quotes around it if I didn’t say it! That’s just literary consideration 101.

Second of all, I’m 5’4″. A “pound or two” is not my issue. The 5-7 pounds I could stand to lose so that I’d look more like the women I see on TV and in magazines is technically what my issue might be, but it’s not like I am a petite 4’10” where literally a pound or two does make a difference and shows up. You lose a pound or two simply from having a healthy bowel movement. I do not need to lose a pound or two!

Third and finally, if I wanted to lose weight, it’s very simple. I’d stop eating all the fun food I eat all the time and work out more. As a friend recently said when he was asked how he lost weight, he said, “Well, I stopped eating like every day was my f**king 12th birthday.” I sort of always eat like it’s my 12th birthday. I get it.

This isn’t about weight, though. It’s about journalistic integrity, for the love of Pete! If you want to sell a skinny lifestyle of deprivation and false perfection to America’s women, don’t use me to do it. I’m a horrible example. And proud of it.

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