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What Kveller Parents Are Sorry For This Year

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As a play on the Yom Kippur confessional prayer, the Vidui, we asked you, our readers, to confess one thing you felt sorry about this year (a Kvidui, if you will). And you delivered. This past week, Kveller’s blog, Facebook, and Twitter feeds were flooded with messages of self-reflection, honesty, and even some humor.

The idea of the Vidui is for the Jewish people to band together and collectively atone for each other’s sins. So now that the sins are in, here they are without names–because they belong to all of us. We hope that, by reading these, you can recognize some parts of yourself, and together we can purge ourselves of the impatience, self-doubt, guilt, and many other flaws we experience as parents.

Thank you so much for your honesty. We wish everyone a meaningful Yom Kippur and, if you plan to fast, have an easy one.

I’m sorry that I texted in times when I should have picked up the phone. 

I’m sorry I doubted myself, I’m sorry I doubted Hashem. I’m sorry I knowingly gave less than my all. 

I’m sorry for thinking it was about me; sometimes it’s really not about you!

I’m sorry I’ve let my anxiety interfere with friendships, my marriage, my family, and career.

I’m sorry for not putting myself first. I can’t make this world better or bring joy to the world and the people I love if I’m not prioritizing my own needs and self care.

I am sorry that it took me such a long time to go out of my way for people who did not deserve my kindness. 

I am sorry that I run to hug, kiss, and love-up my grandchildren with barely a nod to their parents, my children. It’s not exactly that I’m happier to see those little yummies but…well, maybe it is.

I’m sorry for saying something yucky about a relative in front of my son, then saying I was talking about someone he didn’t know. 

I’m sorry for the many times on social media where, with or without saying anything, I judged too harshly or unfairly assumed the worst.

I’m sorry that I am a terrible friend when it comes to using the phone. I am much better and faster with texting and e-mailing, but I know those aren’t always the best communications modes.

I’m sorry that I didn’t forgive my sister before she unexpectedly died this year.

I’m sorry for too much time spent on Facebook instead of giving my girls the attention they want. And for “accidentally” skipping pages in really long books they want to read.

I’m sorry that, due to ill health, I have not been the wife and mother that I had planned to be at this stage of the game.

I’m sorry I lost my temper when it wasn’t warranted.

I’m sorry sometimes my patience wears thin and the outcome annoys me. Time to work on self-control and be more understanding of others.

I’m sorry I procrastinated on a case for an immigrant client and she had to give birth without her husband who did not get his visa on time.

I’m sorry I told my daughter that my cookie was gone so I wouldn’t have to share it. I still had two bites.

I’m sorry for hurrying my kids along when I should have stopped and listened.

I am sorry that I sometimes engage with my phone, rather than my small boys.

I’m sorry for being so hard on my daughter and expecting too much of her.

I’m sorry that I didn’t take better care of myself. 

I’m sorry for a badly-timed text. 

I’m sorry for allowing my wife to take our daughters to synagogue for shofar; we should have gone together.

I throw Legos away when I see them on the floor… but not the little guys. I feel too bad about that.

I’m sorry for often forgetting to play music at home even though it’s easy to click on and makes us all happier.

I’m sorry I throw my kid’s toys out when I find them on the floor.

I’m sorry I did not have patience. I did not control my temper. As per usual. 

I’m sorry in the middle of the night, I said, “Shut up you stupid baby,” to my then 4-week-old. 

I’m sorry for shushing my kids when I simply need to use my big girl words! Ugh, so embarrassing! 

I’m sorry that I hijacked Kveller’s Facebook page to solve my own parenting issues.


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