Pamela Lebedda is a Long Islander by birth, Pittsburgher by marriage, and resident of New Jersey because it falls someplace between the two. After a twelve year battle with infertility, she and her husband are parents to the most amazing child ever adopted. After fifteen years editing, she is now making her way on the other side. Her blog can be found at pagestagerage.blogspot.com.
Tracy Newman wrote amazing lists of things not to do—and to do—at a Shiva recently. It’s been three years since my mom passed and I also remember the things that helped and hurt. I thought I…would add my own some concrete suggestions of things you can do to help in ways you might never have thought about. Here are six things to do when you pay a shiva call. 1. Ask about allergies and think outside the food box. Jews bring food after a death. You don’t walk into a… >> Read More
It has only been a little over a month since the election. The news is filled with hate crimes. All over the country I read about how vandals are defacing synagogues, the homes of Jews, and even…Unitarian Churches. Have my fellow Americans always hated this much? Is it just all right to say so now with the election of Donald Trump as president? I have been musing of how to combat this. I don’t want to become more bitter and cynical. I also don’t want this to be the new normal--one… >> Read More
My little girl is 4, with all that implies. She has a fondness for rules. She’s outgoing and will introduce herself unless I ask her to, and then she turns shy. She questions everything, and I do…mean everything, numerous times. She is, after a dozen infertile years, the biggest joy in my life. This year will be the third year I take her to High Holiday services. And this year she will be aware of how much she doesn’t look like the other kids. She’s Asian, you see, born in China… >> Read More
It is Friday night and I’ve dug out the veil that I put over my head to light three Sabbath candles. As usual, my nearly 4-year-old daughter grabs it from my head and I content myself with a napkin.…I light the candles, like my mother before me and my grandmother before her. I wave my hands over the candles three times and I say the blessing. Hearing it repeated by my child is sweeter than the honey that I let her taste. I touch my daughter’s head and feel the hair that is… >> Read More