Over the past year we’ve watched Jewish mom and actress Selma Blair endure the difficult beginning stages of multiple sclerosis.
From debuting her glamorous walking cane on the Oscars red carpet to sharing images of her freshly shaved head on Instagram, Blair, 47, has publicly documented the effects of the debilitating disease in an effort to raise awareness for MS. She’s spoken many a time about her pain and struggle, all while raising her 8-year-old son, Arthur, as a single mom.
The Storytelling star continues to exhibit extraordinary bravery and strength, wowing fans everywhere. And although she’s raising her child solo, she’s not battling MS alone: Behind this incredibly powerful woman is a badass best friend. And, in case you didn’t know, that BFF is Buffy the Vampire Slayer herself, Sarah Michelle Gellar, who is also a Jewish mom to Charlotte, 9, and Rocky, 6.
Blair and Gellar, 42, have been tight pals since they starred in the cult 1999 film, Cruel Intentions. Over the past two decades, Gellar has done everything from travel with Blair to fight for her, proving she’s the best Jewish friend a girl can have.
As an ode to Blair and Gellar’s unwavering friendship, we’re taking a close look at what makes their relationship so special.
1. Gellar organizes meal trains
In Judaism, bikkur holim, visiting the sick, is a high mitzvah. If you take a look at Gellar’s Instagram feed, you’ll see she carves out chunks of time to hang with her friend. But that’s not all — like any sane Jewish person, Gellar knows food is the ultimate nourishment for the soul.
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First of all, if you haven’t read this weeks beautiful @people magazine article on my girl @selmablair … what are you waiting for?!? Secondly I want to take a minute, to not just thank Selma’s friends, but to thank my friends, some of whom have never even met Selma. Watching your friend face disease, you feel so helpless. Everything you think of seems small in comparison. But what I’ve come to learn is that no gesture is small. I realized, it was very hard for Selma to cook and shop, and healthy eating is so important, when you are sick. A friend introduced me to #mealtrain. It’s the easiest way to organize food delivery to someone who needs it. I sent an email around about it, and within minutes, every slot was filled. So many friends of mine, who don’t even know Selma signed up, just to do something kind for someone who was struggling. Talk about restoring faith in human kindness. Thank you to everyone who participated, and to those who continue to. If you have a friend that could use this- here it is- https://www.mealtrain.com/ People can cook and drop off, or use any delivery service or app. It’s truly a simple act, that can make a huge difference. @mealtrain
In an Instagram post, Gellar wrote that she feels helpless watching Blair face a disease: “Everything you think of seems small in comparison. But what I’ve come to learn is that no gesture is small. I realized, it was very hard for Selma to cook and shop, and healthy eating is so important, when you are sick.”
So, using the app Meal Train, Gellar organized loads of friends and family to send meals to the Blair household. “Sarah started the meal train, which is good because my kid likes to eat dinner and that wouldn’t happen without it,” Blair told People.
In fact, Gellar’s mitzvah encouraged Blair to “pay it forward” and start a meal train for friend she met on social media who is struggling with chemotherapy. “I was getting all these meals, why not also pay it forward and start one for her?” Blair said.
2. Gellar showers Blair with love.
In February, Blair stood on the world stage for the first time since her MS diagnosis, when she walked the Oscars red carpet in a gorgeous gown and walking cane to match. The proud best friend that she is, Gellar wrote a glowing Instagram post commending her dear friend for her bravery.
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This is my dear friend @selmablair Last night she stood on the world stage for the first time, since being diagnosed with MS. And later this week, she is taking an even bigger step, and speaking publicly on @goodmorningamerica (with, my girl crush @robinrobertsgma ) To say I’m proud, would be a gross understatement. When I have a cold, I want to hide from the world under my covers. But not Selma. She is facing this diagnosis, the way she faces everything, with dignity, grace and head on. I know the support and encouragement that she has received on this platform has truly been a source of strength for her. This is not an easy journey, but Selma will not let this define her. I love you James.
“When I have a cold, I want to hide from the world under my covers. But not Selma,” Gellar wrote. “She is facing this diagnosis, the way she faces everything, with dignity, grace and head on.”
3. Blair reciprocates the love!
Gellar isn’t the only one who doles out heartwarming Instagram captions. A few days after the Oscars, Blair shared her appreciation for her “angel of a friend” who tucked her in bed, brought her dinner, and “loved me up” with a slideshow of adorable selfies of the two.
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Our relationship began with me fighting for you, and I will spend the rest of my life continuing to fight for you. This is one of those bumps in the road, that I truly believe within the year, we will barely remember. (And thanks for leaving the part out where I proceeded to fall asleep in your bed- lots of help I am lol) #Repost @selmablair with @get_repost ・・・ This girl. (Always my girl) is everything. She tucked me in and brought me dinner and loved me up. I woke with so much love for #sarahmichellegellar . Since the day I met her over 20 years ago, she fought for me along with @rogerkumble to be Cecile. She took me under her wing and today is no different. I am so in love with my angel of a friend. The best. @janeylopatey also shared the love on my bed yesterday. She and @karenzambos @jaime_king and this one even threw me my baby shower and are there every step of the way. May we all have a friend like this. I love you @sarahmgellar and my whole team of lovelies . I count my blessings. #friendsforever
In response, Gellar said: “Our relationship began with me fighting for you, and I will spend the rest of my life continuing to fight for you. This is one of those bumps in the road, that I truly believe within the year, we will barely remember.”
4. The first time they met, sparks flew.
When Gellar said her relationship with Blair “began with me fighting for you,” she meant it. Apparently, when they met more than 20 years ago at the initial audition for Cruel Intentions, Gellar fought for Blair to land the role of Cecile.
In an interview with EW, Gellar gushed about that first time they met: “It’s like something clicked with us. Every big milestone in my life, whether it was my 21st birthday or Selma’s baby shower, I just can’t imagine my life without her standing next to me. Nobody makes me laugh, and nobody knows how to put me in my place faster than Selma does.”
5. Let’s talk about Cruel Intentions.
Speaking of Cruel Intentions… it’s time we address the iconic kiss scene. In the movie, frenemies Kathryn (Gellar) and Cecile (Blair) share a steamy kiss that has been responsible for many fans’ sexual awakening. It was Blair’s first kiss with a woman, and it became so popular that the duo won the MTV Movie Award for Best Kiss in 2000.
Whereas Gellar remembers thinking she “could kiss Selma all day!” in an interview with EW, Selma revealed that her mom was displeased with her kissing technique. “Honestly, Selma, did you have to use so much tongue?” Blair’s mom said. “That poor Sarah, she looks so delicate, and then you just have that Goliath in her mouth.”
That kiss scene isn’t just beloved by fans — it’s became integral to the Jewish moms’ relationship, too. Since joining Instagram in 2015, Gellar has used the scene almost exclusively to wish Blair a happy birthday.
The first post doesn’t include the spit swap, but the caption sure does! “You will always be the only woman I’ve ever won an award for kissing,” Gellar wrote.
The following year, Gellar shared a reenactment of the kiss: “To my friend Selma Blair, who may be an award winning kisser, but should be an award winning friend and mother!!” Awww.
In 2017, things get really steamy: “So Selma…. Kissing burns 6.4 calories a minute. Want to workout!?”
And 2019: “I may not be be able to spend your birthday with you, but that won’t stop me from sending kisses.”
6. Gellar has the keys to Blair’s house.
Gellar is so tight with Blair that can she can walk into her house anytime she likes. “Sarah’s in my life daily,” Blair told EW, ”helping me and being a friend always.”
“Selma tries to get rid of me, but I have the keys to her house, so she’s stuck with me,” Gellar responded.
7. They go to Disneyland together!
About 21 years after they first went to Disneyland together as young adults, Gellar accompanied her best friend and and son to the park. In a series of adorable photos, they are seen in matching army-green clothing, with Gellar pushing Blair around in a wheelchair.
Spending her day rolling Blair around Disneyland so she can enjoy the experience with her son? There’s no better word to describe Gellar than as a true mensch.
8. Gellar presented Blair with an award.
At the annual Race to Erase MS gala earlier this year, Gellar, along with Good Morning America host Robin Roberts, presented Blair with the honorable Medal of Hope.
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You know I wanted to kiss her for always being by my side. Thank you @sarahmgellar for presenting me with the medal of hope along with my mentor of sorts @robinrobertsgma . #racetoerasems gala 2019 . What a night. Thank you @nancypeaceandlove for always bringing the hope and determination. And @csiriano for this custom tuxedo. #everything. 🖤💋💋💋💋💋💋
“I know firsthand that, as friends and family, we only want to help, but we can never truly understand what that person is going through. And by showing these truths, Selma is letting other people know that they are not alone and that is a true friend,” Gellar said while presenting Blair with the award. “I don’t think there is a stronger person that I know and I’m so proud to be her friend.”
9. The feeling is mutual.
Blair knows that Gellar is the best best friend ever, and she wants everyone else to know, too. Instead of screaming the fact from the rooftops, Blair shared her undying love for Gellar in an Instagram post.
“The first time I went to Disney was with you. The first girl kiss was with you. The first award was with you. The first husband I kissed onscreen was yours,” Blair wrote. (To answer your question, yes, Blair did kiss Gellar’s husband, Freddie Prinze, Jr., in the 2000 movie Down to You.)
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Happy birthday to the beautiful and good @sarahmgellar . We made a pact to go back next year to where we spent your birthday the year we first became friends. The first time I went to Disney was with you. The first girl kiss was with you. The first award was with you. The first husband I kissed onscreen was yours. My first lessons as a working actress were from you. My first ( only) baby shower was from you. ( and a few other dear ones ) you kept loving me. And I keep loving you. #family. Happy birthday princess Smg I'm holding you to celebrating together next year. 💛💋⭐️✨⭐️🎂 with kids 👊🌟
Blair made it clear the BFFs have a long history of firsts together: “My first lessons as a working actress were from you. My first (only) baby shower was from you (and a few other dear ones). You kept loving me. And I keep loving you #family.”
These Jewish BFFs prove that true friendship can stand the test of time. Through thick and thin, Gellar will always be Blair’s chosen one.
Image via Gregg DeGuire/Stringer/Getty Images North America; Frank Tapper/Contributor/Corbis Entertainment